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Posts Tagged ‘families’

Today I had a very interesting (if aggravating) discussion with my husband.  Before I begin, let me say that my good husband is a smart hardworking man.  Darling Hubby comes in from work most days and becomes busy with chores of one variety or another.  He doesn’t ask me a lot of questions concerning my time or the children.  Yet, everyday I fill him in on most everything he has missed.  In addition,  just like most families, we  have dinnertime discussions.  We have discussions about all kinds of things from abortion to politics.  

That is why today gave me pause.  You see, today I began to wonder if an alien has taken over my husband’s body…or at least his mind.

My good husband walks into the room holding a book.  I notice the title, “Politically Incorrect Guide to History.” Excitedly he begins to wave the book as he begins to tell me that my ideas and understanding of history are wrong.  I look up and smile.  You know, the type of smile that says you believe the person in front of you is insane.  He then proceeds to tell me about this Quaker (William Penn) and how he was a pacifist.  My smile freezes into a cold stare.  (At this point I am staring at him to see if he is a zombie or an alien.)  For the next fifteen minutes he tells me about Quakers.  He uses words like ‘them’ and ‘those people’ as he explains.  All the while he is waving this book in front of me.  Finally, I can take it no longer.  I place my book on the couch and stare at him as I softly state, “Honey, I am a Quaker and so are your children.”  Now, it is his turn to stare.  He starts to sputter in disbelief. 

I don’t get mad when he forgets I detest the color yellow, or when he forgets that I don’t like rhubarb, or even when he cooks food I’m allergic.  I don’t get mad when he yells about his lost comb that is laying in the drawer in front of him.  But this!  How did he miss this?  I’m completely at a loss.  My only explanation is that this man cannot be my husband.  My husband must have been taken by aliens and a drone placed here with me.  It’s the only explanation, because surely my husband is more observant than THAT!

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I feel like my household is lost to the modernization of today’s lifestyles.  What do I mean?  I mean we are on vacation and that between the tv, video games, laptops, microwaves, ice machines, cell phones, mp3, ipods, itouch, iphones, and more that my children do not live but merely exist.  I have long banned the use of electronics during daytime hours, but my husband allowed the tv to be on during a vacation. Welcome in electronics!    It is horrid.  The kids are sitting on the couch staring at the tv.  They might wonder off for a moment to grab a call on the cell and then wonder back as if a moth to the tv.  I told them that come Monday that the ban would be in place once again but for today, sit and drool.  DH is asleep in front of the tv.  And I am sitting in front of the tv typing on my laptop.  It is horrible how quickly we toss living for existing when we stare at the tv.

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I continue to be saddened by the sheer meanness that some people can exhibit.  It is not my place to judge them, nor shall I try to judge them.  Yet, it does make my heart saddened.   Sometimes it isn’t calculated meanness but rather the coldness exhibited by playing a video game while another child stands alone or talking on a cell phone while an elder struggles.  We have disconnected from one another and have turned to electronics to love and befriend us.   

Today is a beautiful day.  Wouldn’t it be all the lovelier if we reached out in kindness, love, and a calm spirit to another?  If we offered a helping hand? 

My goal for the day is to reach out to strangers that I might not otherwise reach out.  I don’t mean the lady carrying groceries that I would normally grab the door for, that is a given, of course, I would reach out to her.  But what about the teenage boy who is talking on the cell phone when I walk by, today I will say hello and wave.  The postman where I purchase my stamps, I will ask him about his family.  Today, I will try and be a little more human and show more basic kindness.     

And for today, I will turn off my cell and unplug my earphones, unplug my pc, and reach out. 

We shall see see what happens.

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Tonight my kiddos and I sat by the outside fireplace and roasted wieners.  Such a relaxing and bonding time for the kids and myself. It was nice to sit by the fire and talk.  No music, tv, or video games to interrupt.  Simply the four kids and myself enjoying nature, each other, and simple food.  I hope they remember nights like this.  

I had to smile because we would look at the stars and then pop a burnt marshmallow into our mouths as we talked about the fire.  It was bliss!  Simple.  Fun.  It helped bring a quiet loving spirit to our home tonight.

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Three simple words, but such a hard thing to really do. 

The homeless man on the street looks your way and you look away. Have you ever done that?  I have.  And then felt guilty.   Are we showing him kindness?  No.  Not even the basic kindness of looking him in the eye, meeting him as a person with a smile. 

Forgiveness is another really hard thing to do.  Can we forgive someone who has truly hurt us?  I don’t know.  I try.  Sometimes, I can.  I was able to forgive the boy who killed my brother.  Yet, I can’t seem to forgive someone who gossips about me. 

And then there is Love.   Love should be an easy one, right?  Think again.  I love my spouse, my children, my friends, and strangers.  Yet, do I extend love to all?  A welcoming love that says I see you are worthy person.  Sometimes.  But sometimes I fail.  Sometimes pride or fear will get in the way. 

I am working on these, but they are honestly hard for me.  I struggle.  I fail sometimes.  Now, Integrity, Peace, and Faith are  much easier for me. 

 I will continue to work on Forgiveness, Kindness, and Love.  Daily! Yes, on a daily basis. 

(For any who are curious, the tv daytime ban is holding.  My children watched a total of 30 minutes television today and that was a DVD tonight about 8 p.m. )

Hugs to all!

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Russia 3 years ago

Three years ago, my husband and I stood in front of a Russian judge.  We weren’t criminals or charged with anything.  Rather, we were adopting a beautiful blond-haired little boy and a dark-haired grey eyed darling baby girl.  I remember the judge granting the adoption and my husband grinning broadly.  We hugged each other in the courtroom, the hallway, in the car, and again at the orphanage.  We couldn’t believe it!  Our family had just gained 2 wonderful kids. 

Today those children are happy and loveable.  They are also very much my children! 

Tonight we celebrated with a bonfire, marshmallows, and hotdogs.   

We are a wonderfully happy family.  One I am very proud to have.

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Good friends and Differences

I love my friends.  Yes, it is that simple.  

I love seeing the differences that make each of us unique. 

I love the differences in our belief systems.  For some, it is church on Sunday, Sunday nights, and Wednesday.  For others I am pretty sure they have not walked into a church in twenty years.  Yet, I love them all. 

I have friends who dress in clothes that have not been in fashion for several hundred years, friends who dress plain, friends who dress in purple and reds, and friends who dress in goth.

I have friends who travel around the world playing fiddles on the tallest mountains. Friends who live in other countries.  Friends who have never left the town they were born.   

Yet, they are all awesome.  Each and every one.  Cherished friends they are.

They are wonderful people.  Opinionated, yes.  I seldom have a friend who is not opinionated.  Unique, yes.  Wonderfully unique.   Yet, it is their uniqueness, their sense of self, that I admire.    

I hope that I hold as close a place in their hearts as they hold in mine.  And I hope that I am there when they need me.

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